NL West:
1. Dodgers - Assuming the pitching holds up and "clutch hitting" actually exists on this team. At least Joe Torre has enough cred to tell Jeff Kent to shut his fucking pie-hole.
2. D'backs - Their pitching is better with Dan Haren in the rotation, but their hitting remains a question mark.
3. Rockies - The good news for the Rockies is that they kept most of the team that went to the World Series. However, it is the same team that hovered around .500 until they got hot in August/September.
4. Padres - There is only so far this franchise can get by with other teams' sloppy seconds. Having Jim Edmonds replace Mike Cameron in CF is already biting them in the ass. They better hope Randy Wolf's arm doesn't explode like it did last season.
5. Giants - They'll finish dead last, but it will be a quiet last place finish without Barry Bonds.
NL Central:
1. Brewers - Chris Capuano is on the 15-day DL, but they should be okay as long as Ben Sheets remains healthy and effective. The only question mark is how effective Eric Gagne will be without the juice.
2. Cubs - No Alfonso Soriano for awhile, but Lou Pinella will find a way to get these guys to win.
3. Cardinals - Let the rebuilding begin!
4. Reds - They might become a better team when Griffey finally retires and they say goodbye to Adam Dunn, the human whiff machine.
5. Astros - Yep, they needed a strong pitcher to go along with Roy Oswalt in the rotation, so they got Miguel Tejada instead.
6. Pirates - Arrr! Last place again, mateys!
NL East:
1. Mets - Letting Paul LoDuca, Shawn Green, and Lastings Milledge was clearly the case of "addition by subtraction" (though the jury is still out on Milledge). Getting Johan Santana to bolster a pretty solid rotation will get the Mets back into the post-season.
2. Phillies - They won't get lucky this season.
3. Nationals - The Jim Bowden Home For Wayward Baseball Players is the East Coast dark side of the West Coast feel good Padres, but they will break .500 and scare the hell out of the Mets and Phils.
4. Braves - Who the hell are they fooling? Their downward spiral back to the basement continues.
5. Marlins - Kinda sucks to have most of your starting rotation on the DL from
last season.
Wild Card: D'backs
Pennant: Dodgers (I can dream)
AL West:
1. Angels - Even with John Lackey and Kelvim Escobar on the shelf, the Angels still own the AL West.
2. Seattle - Sorry guys, but Erik Beddard ain't the stud the writers were proclaiming him to be this past off-season.
3. A's - Let the rebuilding continue!
4. Rangers - Once again, this team will be languishing in last place while the baseball writers will place bets on who will the next to be traded for prospects. My money's on Michael Young. Milton Bradley will be good for a few meltdowns and broken bats after getting struck out.
AL Central:
1. Tigers - Two words: fucking loaded. I feel bad for Brandon Inge, but hey, if I had a chance to get Miguel Cabrera...
2. Indians - These guys are fucking loaded too and will fight the Tigers tooth and nail for first place.
3. White Sox - What's the over/under on Ozzie saying and/or doing something stupid this season?
4. Twins - I would have had them above the White Sox, but Liriano is starting the season in AAA. Boof Bonser and Livan Hernandez doesn't (and shouldn't) fill anyone with hope. The Twinkies will be okay without Torii Hunter.
5. Royals - I heard their classic powder blue jersey is coming back this season. Whether it will encourage the 2008 squad to play like it's 1978 remains to be seen.
AL East:
1. Red Sox - Too good not to repeat in the East. Even with J.D. Drew in the line-up.
2. Yankees - We'll how much Hank Steinbrenner misses Joe Torre.
3. Blue Jays - I'm almost tempted to put them above the Yanks, but it depends on Roy Halladay and A.J. Burnett's health.
4. Rays - Yeah, this is the year the Rays make their big move out of the cellar and into fourth place!
5. Orioles - Maybe the O's can trade Peter Angelos for prospects too.
Wild Card: Indians
Pennant: Tigers
NL MVP: Prince Fielder
NL Cy Young: Brandon Webb
AL MVP: A-Rod
AL Cy Young: Justin Verlander